~ You never know what the person next to you might
be going through. ~
Feeling overwhelmed and panicked, my thoughts
scattered. My emotions neared the thin line being crossed more often lately. I felt like a stranger to myself as I sat down
in my chair at the moms group.
The
topic today, depression, was led by a woman doctor from our church. She went
through the normal descriptions, I already knew, but when she got to possible
symptoms I sat a little straighter. I was daily experiencing, sadness, stress, a
fixation on escape, spontaneous tears, loss of appetite, fatigue, and evidence
of other physical strains. There was enough common ground with what she was
saying that I knew I should check this out.
What? Me? Depressed?
Incredulous and hopeful at the same time I asked again and again, how could I
be depressed? Postpartum? But my youngest was born 18 months ago? Different
factors could maybe prolong the time-table? I don’t know.
We
were looking for answers. I had recently said leaving words to David and he the
staying words. Maybe this new information was an answer to some of the why behind the leaving words. I typed
out my list of symptoms and made an appointment with a doctor.
Yes,
depression was a part of the puzzle. I
was relieved yet humiliated by this reality. However, in this process I had begun
speaking the truth of what I had been thinking and feeling. There was power in
getting it out of my head and communicating it to others. The swirling thoughts
spoken began to lose their hold over me. I was thankful to have a name to call
much of what I was going through. Little did I know this was just the beginning
of the healing process, God had so much more in store.
Heavenly
Father,
Thank
you for all of who You are. Help us to know you as the Forgiver of our sins and
Healer of all our diseases. You have bought back our lives from the pit. You
put finishing touches on us through Your steadfast love and mercy. Help us to
see some of this tender work You are doing in our lives. When we,
who have trusted in Christ, cry for help, You hear and deliver us out of all of
our troubles. You are near to the brokenhearted and save those
who are crushed in spirit. Help us to be attentive to Your Words. Let them always
be in our sight. Help us to keep them in our hearts. For they
are life to those who find them, and healing to all our flesh. Thank you for
your Word. Help us to delight in it. Thank you that through Your Word we survive
and have victory, hope, and healing. Help
us to think about it day and night, so that we may be careful to do according
to all that is written in it. Thank you that if we do this our way will prosper,
and then we will have good success. Help us to be strong
and courageous, not to be frightened, and dismayed, for You the Lord our God are with us wherever we go. Thank you God that we
can do exceedingly, abundantly, beyond all that we are asking or can imagine
through the power that is at work within us, the Holy Spirit. To You be the
glory in (us) the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations,
forever and ever.
In
Jesus Name,
Amen
“Bless
the Lord, O my soul, and
forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your
diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with
steadfast love and mercy,” (Psalm
103:2-4)
“When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The
Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many
are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers
him out of them all.” (Psalm 34:17-19)
“If your law had not been my delight, I would have perished in my affliction.” (Psalm 119:92)
“This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:8-9
“Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” Ephesians 3:20-21
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