Knowing the Truth – The Healing of Ceasing

          I knew things needed to change. I couldn’t continue at the same pace or lifestyle. I had to choose to stop.

Depression had been diagnosed, medication prescribed, and I was beginning to identify and replace the lies by reading the truth, God’s Word. At the same time God had a special gift of further healing in store for me, a hug from Him.

Still battling feelings of guilt and failure, I was overwhelmed with the care of our two boys. I needed a break. I wasn’t even sure what to do to take a break. My mother-in-law and others would take turns every so often in watching the boys. At these times I somehow found myself going away from my home alone to draw.

Being still I sat and observed. I was able to take in the beauty given by my Creator. He had fashioned and allowed mankind to craft also. I took pictures of natural beauty or what people made and then tried my hand at creating.

There wasn’t a driving goal or purpose to achieve, this was a break.  This was the filling of the blank page with marks representing something observed. Somehow this act of stillness yet creating was healing and filling.

 

 “Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!” Psalm 46:10 (ESV)

  “Cease striving and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.” Psalm 46:10 (NASB)

Heavenly Father,

Thank you for beauty and stillness. Help us to cease our striving. Heal us. Apart from You we can do nothing, but we can do all things through Christ in us, the Holy Spirit, who gives us strength. Thank you for the beauty You have created. Thank you for the healing in the act of creating something. Thank you that You desire healing in us: body, mind, soul, and spirit. Thank you that You have given us all that we need to live life. Lead us and guide us through Your Word. Help us know You are God. We exalt You! You deserve all the honor, glory, and praise!

In Jesus Name,

Amen!

 

^{~  “}I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5)

 

~  “Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”  (Ephesians 3:20-21)

 

~  “Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy,”  (Psalm 103:2-4)

 

~  “His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.” (2 Peter 1:3)

~  “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.” (Psalm 119:105)

 

 

Knowing the Truth - A Helpful Diagnosis

 ~ You never know what the person next to you might be going through. ~

 Feeling overwhelmed and panicked, my thoughts scattered. My emotions neared the thin line being crossed more often lately. I felt like a stranger to myself as I sat down in my chair at the moms group.   

The topic today, depression, was led by a woman doctor from our church. She went through the normal descriptions, I already knew, but when she got to possible symptoms I sat a little straighter. I was daily experiencing, sadness, stress, a fixation on escape, spontaneous tears, loss of appetite, fatigue, and evidence of other physical strains. There was enough common ground with what she was saying that I knew I should check this out.

What? Me? Depressed? Incredulous and hopeful at the same time I asked again and again, how could I be depressed? Postpartum? But my youngest was born 18 months ago? Different factors could maybe prolong the time-table? I don’t know.

We were looking for answers. I had recently said leaving words to David and he the staying words. Maybe this new information was an answer to some of the why behind the leaving words. I typed out my list of symptoms and made an appointment with a doctor.

Yes, depression was a part of the puzzle.  I was relieved yet humiliated by this reality. However, in this process I had begun speaking the truth of what I had been thinking and feeling. There was power in getting it out of my head and communicating it to others. The swirling thoughts spoken began to lose their hold over me. I was thankful to have a name to call much of what I was going through. Little did I know this was just the beginning of the healing process, God had so much more in store.

 

Heavenly Father,

Thank you for all of who You are. Help us to know you as the Forgiver of our sins and Healer of all our diseases. You have bought back our lives from the pit. You put finishing touches on us through Your steadfast love and mercy. Help us to see some of this tender work You are doing in our lives. When we, who have trusted in Christ, cry for help, You hear and deliver us out of all of our troubles.  You are near to the brokenhearted and save those who are crushed in spirit. Help us to be attentive to Your Words. Let them always be in our sight. Help us to keep them in our hearts.  For they are life to those who find them, and healing to all our flesh. Thank you for your Word. Help us to delight in it. Thank you that through Your Word we survive and have victory, hope, and healing.  Help us to think about it day and night, so that we may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. Thank you that if we do this our way will prosper, and then we will have good success. Help us to be strong and courageous, not to be frightened, and dismayed, for You the Lord our God are with us wherever we go. Thank you God that we can do exceedingly, abundantly, beyond all that we are asking or can imagine through the power that is at work within us, the Holy Spirit. To You be the glory in (us) the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever.

In Jesus Name,

Amen

“Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy,”  (Psalm 103:2-4)

“When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.  The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.” (Psalm 34:17-19)

“My son, be attentive to my words; incline your ear to my sayings.  Let them not escape from your sight; keep them within your heart.  For they are life to those who find them, and healing to all their flesh.” (Proverbs 4:20-22)

“If your law had not been my delight, I would have perished in my affliction.” (Psalm 119:92)
 
“This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:8-9

“Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”  Ephesians 3:20-21

Knowing the Truth - Opening the Fist

I was left feeling raw and exposed. My support and security were crumbling with the shattering weight I had been carrying my entire life. Through my lie crusted eyes I caught a glimmer of hope. If my lifestyle was not truly the way to live I had the hope of something else. 

My recent near departure from my family helped to solidify the seriousness of what was going on. I clung to, "...so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it.” (Isaiah 55:11) In my weary, empty state of mind and body I somehow knew I needed to hold on to this hope.

All my foundations had been ripped out. I needed something real, true, and powerful to bolster my life. I was too weary to have an agenda of how this would be accomplished. I wanted to live but I knew I didn’t know the way.

My hands began to open before God. “…it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it.” I needed God to accomplish His purposes and succeed. I needed the hope of something to fill my void. I was done.

 And so my journey to truth and healing began…the Word, and beginnings of opening the fist. Seeking God’s Word every day or most days, I prayed, “Help me. Teach me. Show me the way.”

Heavenly Father,

Thank you that You see who we really are. Thank you that You know the plans You have for us, plans to prosper us and not to harm us, plans to give us a future and a hope. Thank you that Your Word will not leave us empty. Succeed in us and fill us up with You. Help us to open the fist. Thank you that You do not force Yourself on us. Help us surrender so that we can receive your loving, life-giving help. We need You. Help us. Teach us. Show us the way.

In Jesus Name,

Amen!

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”  (Jeremiah 29:11)

“… so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it.” (Isaiah 55:11)